It's Not a Special One
by Settees-under-siege
Summary: One shot for 4.5. Cora reflects on the first birthday she helped Robert to celebrate, prompting her to consider a goal for their future.


She remembered it as if it were yesterday. But in fact it was far from that. As she sat in bed, patiently waiting for Baxter to bring up her breakfast complete with orange juice, Cora closed her eyes and let her mind wander.

* * *

_June 12__th__, 1890_

_She had felt her heart plummet down to earth with the rain drops that fell from the sky as she stared out the window that morning. Having spent the week planning a surprise picnic for her and Robert, Cora had gone to bed eagerly anticipating the next day. Today was Robert's birthday and she had been determined that his first birthday as a married man should be memorable, despite the fact that the age he was turning wasn't considered by society to be anything special. And yet she had overlooked one essential detail - She couldn't control the weather. Summer it may be but in England, that didn't count for much and she had already begun to realize that last year when she first arrived for the season. It had been a simple error on her part. The error of assumption. And it had cost her dearly because she had no alternative plan. Turning away from the heavy grey spectacle she sank down onto the chair in front of her vanity and sighed, unsure how to stitch up her foiled plans. _

_She considered having the picnic indoors but quickly dismissed the idea, knowing that she would never hear the end of it from her overbearing mother-in-law. She knew she could go down to the kitchen and make sure that Mrs Dawson prepared his favourite food for dinner and resolved to do that within the hour but somehow, it didn't feel as if it were enough. Resting her elbows on her vanity, she allowed her hands to cradle her head as she felt the first signs of a headache coming on. If only she could procure a decent idea at short notice. Then it came to her, like a lightning bolt slamming into the ground. Jumping to her feet, her sore head quite forgotten, she made a hasty exit from her bedroom, bound for the library._

* * *

The door of her bedroom clicked open and Baxter entered with the breakfast tray in hand.

"Good morning My Lady," she acknowledged politely.

"Good morning Baxter," Cora answered. Baxter glided silently around to her side of the bed and carefully maneuvered the tray across her mistress's lap.

"Will that be all My Lady?"

"For now, yes. Thank you Baxter." The ladies maid nodded and left Cora to her breakfast.

Cora began to absentmindedly butter her toast as images and feelings of old filled her mind. Her excitement at having found an agreeable solution, her father-in-law jovially agreeing to her plan, the look on Robert's face when he entered the hall and the way his eyes shone when the music for the first dance began. She could see it all so clearly. She and Patrick had agreed that they would only invite the extended family to celebrate Robert's birthday and as the night wore on, she knew that was an excellent decision on her part. Loitering to say long and involved farewells was not necessary when there were only six additional family members and no guests. They could leave that to Robert's parents and Cora was keen to be alone with Robert for some more dancing of another kind entirely. Blushing at the memory, she realized that she had started to breathe more heavily and her food sat on the plate untouched. A knock at the door announced the presence of her husband as he strolled into her line of vision.

"Aren't you hungry? I passed Baxter at the bottom of the stairs."

"Yes," she replied defensively, mentally shaking herself and beginning to eat.

"Cora your cheeks are pink. Are you feeling alright?" Robert gazed down at his wife, concern flooding his features. Cora felt her cheeks inflame even more as she thought of the cause of her state.

"I'm fine Robert," she mumbled, taking another bite of toast.

"Well if you're sure."

"Mmmhmm. I was thinking of going into Ripon today," she informed him, changing the subject.

"Oh yes, what for?" he asked curiously.

"You'll see soon enough." Cora grinned and winked at him. She had already commissioned her dressmaker to make her a new dress in time for his birthday and had been very specific about the details to be included and today she had the fitting appointment.

"I look forward to that revelation my dear. Well I must be off now I'm afraid or I fear Mary will scold me for making us late for the meeting in York. I just wanted to ask you one thing before we set off."

"And what's that?"

"May I interrupt your eating briefly for a kiss to send me on my way?" he lowered his eyes, feeling like a boy for making such a request. Cora felt her heart melt at his endearing shyness.

"Of course you may darling," she said softly. Robert wasted no time in coming to her side of their bed, bending down, placing his right hand on her neck and his left on the bedpost for balance. Gently, he brushed his lips over hers, lingering for a few seconds before pulling back with a coquettish smile.

"I can taste strawberry jam on your lips," he teased. "That was a delicious experience and I hope I may look forward to more later?"

"You may depend upon it," Cora smirked. "I thought you didn't want to get told off?" she raised her eyebrows.

"I don't. I'll see you this afternoon."

"For our walk?"

"Yes."

"I'll meet you in the library."

"Very good. Now I must be going," Robert insisted.

"I hope it goes well," Cora said as she watched her husband disappear out of the room. Sighing happily, she returned to her remaining piece of toast as she thought about the vision she had of her new dress.

It was to be an alluring red with swirling patterns across the bodice and hem of the dress. And there would be two layers. The layer underneath would be cut modestly across the top of her bosom with simple shoulder straps but the hem would rest above her knees. The overlying fabric would be sheer, thus leaving nothing to her husband's imagination because while his birthday wasn't a major one to their family and wider society, each year together was another year to celebrate. After the traumas of the last few years, Cora had no intention on wasting the remaining part of her life with her husband and family. And since talking to the girls the previous afternoon, she had agreed to host an intimate party of their closest family and friends, similarly to the first birthday she spent with him. As she poured herself a cup of tea, she couldn't help but feel optimistic that perhaps the most turbulent time of their lives had passed.


End file.
